he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
