Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I have aggressive nipples.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
