i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize