Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
