Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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