All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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