i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Randomize
