I swear she didn't look like that last week.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
