so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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