drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
