Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
