dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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