Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize