So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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