Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
