I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize