walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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