Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I just gift wrapped bread.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
