I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
MIDGETS
????
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
