maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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