Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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