i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize