Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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