It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize