no you cant smoke seaweed
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I AM VODKA MAN
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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