i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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