All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
