He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
