why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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