It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
