Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
