I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
