I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
