Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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