I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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