It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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