her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
