my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
