So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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