I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
its not stalking. its research.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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