So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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