I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
