i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
