some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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