NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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