My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Randomize
