I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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