you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
