real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
she smelled like a LAN party
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
