evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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